Marriage Lessons From the 10 Commandments
There are no easy or fast rules for marriage. No code to break. Also, no scientific formula guaranteeing 100% satisfaction. But what if we uncovered marriage lessons from God’s ten commandments?
Since God created marriage, He helps us manage and sustain our marriage as we submit to His ways.
Even more, the Lord possesses all the knowledge to lead us in our marriage.
Yet, our job is to simply seek God’s knowledge.
Rather than producing our own marriage commandments with good advice, let’s use the truths behind God’s Ten Commandments in Deuteronomy 5:7-21.
So keeping the original truth, while reflecting on how each commandment can apply to our spouse, here are ten marriage lessons to help us build a firm foundation.
There are no easy or fast rules for marriage. No code to break. No scientific formula guaranteeing 100% satisfaction. But what if we uncovered marriage lessons from God's ten commandments? Click To TweetMarriage Lessons to Supercharge Our Marriage
1.) You shall have no other gods before me. After God, our spouse is our most important relationship. What “other” things or relationships do you put before God? Then, what about your marriage?
2.) You shall not make for yourself a carved image…for I am a jealous God. God is jealous for our complete loyalty and whole-hearted devotion. In the same way, our spouse desires we stay loyal and devoted. Sexual and emotional faithfulness, and being a faithful friend is important. Do you feel you love your spouse with a steadfast, deep, and sure devotion?
You shall not make for yourself a carved image…for I am a jealous God. God is jealous for our complete loyalty and whole-hearted devotion. In the same way, our spouse desires we stay loyal and devoted. Click To Tweet3.) You shall not take the Lord’s name in vain. Sometimes we are careless with God’s name. Likewise, we want to take careful measures to protect the good name and reputation of our spouse by not saying demeaning comments to friends, in public or even to them. So, what can you do to speak love and respect to and about your spouse?
4.) Observe the Sabbath to keep it holy. After the Lord created the world, everything in it, and us, He established a day of rest called Sabbath. Therefore, it’s an entire twenty-four hours to remember God and set aside a day to worship Him. And it’s a day to cease our work and trust God to provide. Do you practice the Sabbath? How about setting aside times and days to focus on your marriage?
Marriage Lessons to Boost Our Marriage
5.) Honor your father and mother. First of all, are we honoring our parents and the parents of our spouse? Maybe we need to improve at helping with any needs of aging parents, inviting them for dinner, making sure to celebrate how “grand” they are to our kids, and keeping them informed of events and plans. And if they live away, are we staying connected through calls, internet, and FaceTime calls?
6.) You shall not murder. Ruth Graham, wife of Billy Graham, said she never contemplated divorce, but she considered murder. Perhaps we may relate to her humor and candor. But, do we stab our spouse in the back or fatally wound their heart with our mean-spirit or words?
You shall not murder. Ruth Graham, wife of Billy Graham, said she never contemplated divorce, but she considered murder. Do we stab our spouse in the back or fatally wound their heart with our mean-spirit or words? Click To Tweet7.) You shall not commit adultery. This truth stands as is. Another point is how emotional affairs and affairs of the heart are also infidelity.
8.) You shall not steal. Similarly, are we hiding spending, secret credit cards, or fudging on numbers?
9.) You shall not bear false witness. Do we lie to our spouse? Or, what about slandering our spouse? And do we exaggerate our case or our side of an issue?
10.) You shall not covet your neighbor’s spouse. Do we wonder if marriage would be better with someone else? Or, do we covet someone else’s spouse?
Truth Versus Advice
As we established, we can form our own marriage lessons on what may be really good advice. But the Lord and His Word hold the keys to helping us sustain a lasting and wonderful marriage.
I pray these thoughts on marriage from the ten commandments spoke to your heart.
Did any particular lesson resonate with you?
Last week’s article, When I Asked God to Send Me a Friend.
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My husband and I have been married for over 43 years. I am thankful our relationship with God has deepened over the years and we can put Him first. 🙂 Great message Karen.
Melissa, always appreciate how fondly you speak of your marriage in putting God in the center. God bless!
Always love my “dose of Friday on Thursday” my friend. 🙂 I never really considered how the 10 Commandments impacted my marriage beyond that one about adultery; the cause of my divorce from my first wife. Your post points out how so many others are directly applicable to how we treat our marriage and our spouse. I mentioned on another’s post not long ago that I’ve long tried to adhere to a Life Priorities List of: 1) God, 2) Spouse, 3) Other Family, 4) Career, etc. However, there were many times when 2-4 got shuffled because of priorities in my life. And if I’m honest, sometimes #1 was temporarily demoted. In retirement, or at least semi-retirement, I’ve tried to be better about making at least 1-3 pretty static and un-moving, but I’m not always successful. Great way to think about our marriage ma’am. Thank you!
What great wisdom in your comment. Yes, we all must be intentional to keep what matters most in life at the top of our list, with God first and foremost and then our spouse and other things as you mentioned. And I relate to your thought on how sometimes God get’s booted out of the number one spot in our heart. I pray we let God help us keep our priorites in place as He would have them and we seek His counsel and knowledge for our marriage. Since God created marriage, He helps us manage and sustain our marriage as we submit to His ways.
Great analysis Karen. Love it. We’ve been married for 38 years and can always use some reminders to improve our time together.
Yvonne, thanks so much! We need reminders as well after 37 years of marriage. God bless!
My husband and I have been married 45 years. All of the instructions given here, related to the Ten Commandments, are useful. Each of these must be applied to our marriages, for they guide us toward what is right, loving, and loyal to our spouse. A great topic to address, Karen.
Melinda, I love how you said, ” they guide us toward what is right, loving, and loyal to our spouse.” Isn’t that want we desire for a strong, secure and godly marriage? The Lord and His Word hold the keys to helping us sustain a lasting and wonderful marriage.
Most definitely, this spoke to my heart, Karen. I love the concept of applying the Ten Commandments to how we should conduct ourselves with our spouses. Such perfect, solid advice!
Blessings!
Thank you, Martha! I pray it speaks to others and is practical in it’s application as well. God bless.
Love this application of the Ten Commandments to marriage!
And after 40+ years of marriage, I can attest to the value of each of these applications!
Glad this spoke to you, Ava. Thanks for your comment.
Certainly, God did not just announce the ten commandments to Moses in one direction and for a specific task. If we look at each of these ten commandments, we will see that each commandment can be applied in all matters of life. The first commandment: I am your God. God is not only for the time of worship. In all matters of life, one should remember God. A farmer who is planting seeds in the ground should do this with the remembrance of God. Businessmen, engineers, doctors…
don’t steal Theft is not just taking people’s property! Selling short in business, in talking, in expressing love, in teaching a teacher, etc., is considered theft
Murder is not just killing an object. Killing a person’s soul, emotional failure, blinding a person’s motivation, will cause a change in his life. If this change goes to the bad side, this can also be considered murder. Anyway, it is better to start from the first commandment and think about it in all stages of life and act on it. To bring the ten commandments into our lives one by one.
We all need a reminder and a little nudge sometimes in life. Thank you for your reminder.
Marriage is an important thing in life. The ten commandments can be implemented in married life. Then we will see that marriage is not a relationship with an opposite person. Rather, marriage is a relationship with God, provided that we follow all God’s commands. That time of sweetness and happiness that we feel in relation to our life partner is the same sweetness and happiness of relationship with God.
How resourceful you are, Karen. What a great way to look at marriage through the commandments! Wonderful message we would do well to heed. God bless!
These are such great ideas to keep in mind for our marriages. I’ve never thought about it in this way, but I think you did a BRILLIANT job! I love the points on coveting, what we’re putting before our spouse, whether we are gossiping about them, etc.
What a wonderful look at the Ten Commandments and how they apply to marriage, Karen. Early in our marriage, my husband and I agreed not to meet with or have close friends of the opposite sex to protect ourselves from the temptation of even having emotional affairs. Every marriage goes through difficult times and I’m so grateful we continue to hold to that practice–even after nearly thirty years.
Blessings,
Tammy
Tammy, this is great wisdom and insight. And I started to share this in more details in this post, but it was already so long. We also believe you cannot be best or good friends with people of the opposite sex for this reason. Thanks for sharing your thoughts here for others to benefit!
Karen, this is such a great post! I loved how you applied each commandments to an aspect of our marriage relationships. I loved what you said about honoring our parents. As my sons launch/are about to launch, I’m working to keep my parents in the loop of their lives and of mine. And, as they age, I am making time to go spend the day with them, help with things around their home, and try to love well.
Hey Jeanne, I think honoring our parents as we age and they age with our family and our children is one of the best ways to fulfill this commandment. You sound like you are doing a good job of this. God bless!
Great application of each commandment in the area of marriage. Very insightful. We’ve been married for 35 years and have made plenty of mistakes, but have also worked hard at making our relationship successful and one that honors God. So thankful for how God has blessed us along the way!
Kym, thanks for sharing your story and your thoughts. We’ve had our share of hard times and mistakes as well. When we keep the Lord in the center and let Him help counsel and advise us, our marriage is much stronger and godly. Blessings!
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